Waking up to a Monday morning, bright and clear and refreshingly Autumnal, I find a hole in the pit of my stomach. There may be anxiety at the week ahead, but if there is it’s bouncing around wondering where everyone else went. But it’s not a hole, it’s a furious knot.
Why do we even grieve for strangers? I add the term to my digital search history, and find a page referencing Princess Diana. I don’t even want to start on that collective madness. The page uses the term “event grief”, which it turns out is nigh on unsearchable. The summary text in the search results also wonders why princesses wear Tiaras. Because they’re sparkly, of course.
Why do people hold candlelight vigils when a star dies, or shriek when a boyband splits up? How is it we can be so touched by a person’s art?
Distracted, I check twitter. Top of the list: “Camera Obscura keyboardist Carey Lander has died”. One fact check less to do.
The Michigan Daily has a page: “How to grieve for a stranger”. I have to answer at least one but no more than three survey questions to continue reading, but I’d rather not say whether I’ve had any experience with CajunGrocer.com in the last 12 months.
Not grief, but sadness. Sadness clawing at the edges, inside but scrambling for a hold to pull itself up and out.
Don’t overdo it. Try not to be maudlin. Yeah, good one.