…at the link it’s easy.

No, mercifully not that one, now forever tainted (formerly not entirely perfect, mind) by painful commercial association.

I found a corner of the web on which it is claimed that:

Situated in the Massive Leisure World complex, Southampton's Jumpin Jaks has made a huge impact since it opened in 1997!

Now in it's sixth hugely succesful year, the Jaks stage has played host to the UK's biggest chart stars including Jamelia, Liberty X, Lisa Scott Lee, The Cheeky Girls, FYA and Shola Ama.

Other star appearances and performances have included Will Mellor, Jason Donovan, Tony Hadley, Sonia, Boney M, The Venga Boys, 911, Zippy George & Bungle, 2 Unlimited, and Chesney Hawkes to name just a few.

Quite a few of those are very much in the bucket marked “Other”. But there’s more…

Recent live concerts from The Bluetones and Shed Seven have also established Jumpin Jaks as the ideal venue for dedicated live music fans.

Now this last statement, I can confirm, is at least factually correct. Shed Seven did indeed play there; I was there, and to be fair, it was a cracking gig. In a city that also boasts The Joiners, I’d say ideal is a bit of a stretch, though.

Important notes regarding Shed Seven and “Where have you Been Tonight?”

  • In the lyric, note how Rick Witter cleverly rhymes sun with sun and, er, sun.
  • Shed Seven fans alone realise that their band was superior to all those other Britpop bands.
  • Shed Seven fans don’t listen to much music recorded after about 1997.
  • Even Shed Seven fans are embarrassed by that Link advert.